Tips On Getting Over Someone

There's More Than “The Only One” - It's often been said that most of us have a secret love from the past, a person we always keep in our hearts, and wish for what might have been, no matter how happy we are with our present companion or mate. There is something in our makeup that tells us that there is only one person who is just the right one, and unfortunately, we just lost that only one. If you think about it, and think about all the people of the opposite sex you have ever met, you can probably think of at least several that you would be happy living your life with. Taking that thought a step further, you will meet many more people in the future, and find not just one, but several, you could be perfectly happy with (I don't mean polygamy). Get out of the mindset that there is only one person in the universe that could make you truly happy. If that were the case, the chances of any of us finding our true love would be pretty remote.

There are books on the subject of how to get over someone and related topics. These aren't necessarily bad; in fact often contain helpful ideas. As previously touched upon, keep in mind that the author doesn't know personally how you feel, and cannot. The author is writing to an audience, and to the "average" person. Instead of looking in a book, you have to look within yourself. Not many try that approach, but it's the very best approach you can take. By looking into or at yourself, and trying to be as objective as possible (that is not always an easy thing to do), you can start to question yourself as to why you feel the way you do. That sounds a little silly at first, but you are probably not feeling as good about yourself as you should be, plus you likely have put the one you love on a pedestal of sorts. You've been rejected by the "perfect person", and you're not sure how to deal with that. You start by getting that person off of the pedestal, back down to your level, and come to the realization that you haven't been rejected by a god or a goddess, but someone quite human who, like you, has their own feelings and do what they do for their own reasons.

It's Important To Move On - We go through certain phases sometimes when bad things happen, such as  fear, anger, denial, and acceptance. You might experience any or all of these emotions, but denial is certainly one of the key ones, and acceptance is the one you have to work towards. You have to look at what your options are, and if you find there is only one, to move on, then that's what you have to set your mind to starting working on. If you try to cling to what you cannot have, or are very unlikely to get, all you will do is continue to be miserable. It's somewhat like a person who has a chronic illness. It may never go away completely but the person learns to deal with it, and lead a life as normal as possible. Moving on is one of the keys as far as how to get over someone is concerned. It is not the only key, but a vital one. Moving on may mean immersing yourself in a new set of activities, or old one if that's what interests you, not so much with the purpose of forgetting in mind, but with the purpose of gaining new insights and experiences, getting a fresh look at the world if you will. Some refer to this as a "change of scenery".

Love Thyself - The second key is that of learning to love yourself. That sounds a little self-centered or conceited on the surface, but there is nothing wrong with loving yourself. In doing so you can do a better job of what we touched upon earlier, taking stock of yourself, finding out what kind of a person you are, and what you are striving to be. The better you understand yourself, the more likely you are apt to pair up with someone on a permanent basis. Why? Because when you know yourself, you don't feel the need to have to impress anyone. It's "What you see is what you get" with you, and your next soul mate is under no illusion that you are the world's greatest anything, except maybe the world's greatest guy or gal. Then you'll very likley no longer be faced with the issue of how to get over someone.

Pass The Test? - Get a change of scenery, fall in love with yourself.  And now you can think about "Apples" again.